


Lifestyles of the Rich and the Famous

by Nhitori



Category: Hatoful Kareshi | Hatoful Boyfriend
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-31
Updated: 2015-12-31
Packaged: 2018-05-10 15:53:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,230
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5592256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nhitori/pseuds/Nhitori
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tohri Nishikikouji wants to be a celebrity, and it seems like everybody else but him already is.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lifestyles of the Rich and the Famous

Tohri Nishikikouji kept tabs on every single musical artist in the area.

Littledove Hachiman, it seemed, had a booming music industry recently. The number of popular musicians who could currently claim that they hailed from this town was through the roof. While St. Pigeonation’s was a prestigious school, it was not a performing arts school, so it really was a mystery. Tohri couldn’t wrap his head around why HE, who had been trying for so long, hadn’t made it big, while all these others had. Of course he was going to keep tabs on them; he had to examine how their success had come about, so that he might imitate it.

One of the most successful musicians was a man named Yuuya Sakazaki; he had a casanova air about him, and seemed to use that. He was particularly popular with girls of all ages, carrying with him a very clear charm. It certainly did help that he had good facial features, physique, and a simple but clean-cut fashion sense. All the things that Tohri thought that he also had! But… Sakazaki did also have quite the flirtacious personality going for him, and knew just what to say to make ladies swoon… and he spoke French. And sang, in French. How was Tohri supposed to match /that/? He didn’t know any other language.

On the other side of the scale from Sakazaki was his brother, Sakuya Le Bel Shirogane, who was a popular Indie artist along with Hiyoko Tosaka and Ryouta Kawara, who made up a band titled Piano Epitaph. ‘Popular Indie’ was of course the best way to describe them; they were by no means in the mainstream yet, mostly just playing local gigs, but had a following on the internet for their unique sound between Sakuya’s piano playing and the voices of the other two members… but in any case, Tohri’s intention was in no way to be popular among /hipsters/.

Somewhat more popular, though not quite as much as Sakazaki, was a duo who found most of their popularity in teenaged girls who would swoon at the slightest hint of homoromanticism… and this pair had a little bit more than a hint of it. Now, that was an appeal that Tohri could absolutely get behind, if only he had somebody to pair with. As it was, that spot in the musical world seemed to be monopolized by Kazuaki Nanaki and Hitori Uzune in Sterling Lie. Tohri was fairly certain they only picked that name because it sounded nice… but it did sound nice, and he couldn’t deny the popularity those two had going for them.

The least popular band to still have SOME level of exposure to come out of Hachiman recently had to be The Suffering Bastards. It was some sort of weird fucking metal band that consisted of two kids and a bird, and they only got local gigs occasionally, yet had a few die-hard fans who would start comment wars over whether the band was better off without “Dr. Funk”. Initially they’d been called Dr. Funk and The Suffering Bastards, but Tohri hadn’t been around back then, and if this “Dr. Funk” character was no longer involved in the musical scene, he was absolutely irrelevant. Anghel Higure, Nageki Fujishiro, and “Okosan” were the only members who still mattered, and it infuriated Tohri that they still got more gigs than he ever had.

He couldn’t find any direct link between any of those artists, though. No trend, no secret trick with which to gain popularity… As far as he could tell, he was doing nothing wrong. He posted videos online, tried to get gigs in the area, and he certainly wasn’t bad at what he did! All he was missing, it seemed, was luck… He refused to accept that, though. Everyone else who was on their way up from Littledove Hachiman MUST have some secret trait in common, something that he lacked, and he was determined to find it out. Pouring over websites, tabloids, and everything in between, he had become quite the expert.

-

“U-Uzune…” Kazuaki whispered, somehow managing to whine even in a hushed tone, leaning in close to say it as quietly as possible while still being heard by Hitori, and by nobody else, “It’s really loud and crowded, and I want to leave…” He always managed the actual shows just fine, but when it came to interacting with fans afterward, he could barely even handle ten minutes without panicking; though today it was more like five before he expressed his discomfort, because there were more people than usual. That was the real drawback to the duo’s increasing popularity.

“That’s fine. Let’s get back to the hotel,” Hitori made no such effort to keep people from overhearing him, grabbing tight onto Kazuaki’s hand and starting to walk through the crowd. Despite being the much shorter of the two, he was much better at plowing through crowded areas just through merit of his determination not to let anyone stand in his way. When somebody walked with that much purpose, you made way for him. Especially girls who were too busy fainting over the words and the hand-holding to make much of an effort to stay in the same place.

Once back there, Hitori sighed, leaning against the wall right next to the door while Kazuaki walked further into the room and dropped facefirst onto the bed, feet hanging over the edge because hotel beds were just not long enough for him, “Ughhhhhhh… Uzune… Being famous is really hard…!” Kazuaki complained, holding a pillow to his face.

“It’s not being famous that’s hard, it’s dealing with the people you encounter when famous. Like some fancy literate person said once, Hell is other people,” Hitori shrugged, stepping away from the wall to go sit down next to Kazuaki.

“Jean-Paul Sartre,” Kazuaki noted, sitting up as well put keeping the pillow in his lap, “That’s who said that, I mean,” Hitori nodded in understanding as Kazuaki pulled out his phone and opened a mobile game on it, “See, I do know some things.”

“Don’t talk like that,” Hitori rolled his eyes, leaning back with his arms crossed behind his head, closing his eyes once he was looking at the ceiling, “You’re plenty smart. You’re the one who came up with this idea, after all.”

“It… really wasn’t much of an idea at all, really, I just connected a few dots,” He frowned as he started a three-song EX medley on the game, “We had a big spike in album sales after that tabloid photographer caught us holding hands, so…” He shrugged, “It only really made sense…”

“Still, it worked. Who would’ve thought a relationship could be used as a marketing ploy?” Hitori chuckled, glancing over to see that Kazuaki seemed to be getting a full combo. Nice.

“Yeah… but Uzune, don’t think this means you have to stay with me! If you ever want to break up with me, I don’t want you to feel like you can’t because of some dumb idea I had to make us more popular…” He sniffled, and the sound of a dissonant tambourine signaled that he’d gotten too distracted.

“Yeah,” Hitori nodded, lifting a hand up to put it on Kazuaki’s shoulder from where he lay, only able to reach due to his being slouched over the phone, “Same to you, okay?”


End file.
